Patience.

why does this read as condolences for an unsent confession???

poetic and more vague pt 2 of golden doodle boy.

I love you and I’ll wait.

hesitance and holding back what could be free. acceptance I know will never come under your watchful gaze. the pain of unreturned love you never could’ve expected would hurt this much. My eyes never leave you in hopes of something fleeting, maybe just once.

Alas, now it feels scary. My body feels skittish down to the bone, calcium buildings rumbling around under tendon and tissue.

diffidence in my veins like a drug as it makes me complicit to my own feelings. the yearning is abysmal and condenses in my stomach like a forgotten kettle on the stove, red hot and burnt black metal at the root.

i wait and i wait and i wait and i wait and i wait and i wait and i wait and i ache.

an ouroboros of confliction.

oh gods. please let this affliction be gentle with my soul. a blanket for the rot of my aggregate. any kind of salvation for me is more than I’m worth and higher than the depths of my conscious stream.

let me bear the grief of my affection just a little while longer, let me hold the weight of my hunger until it bores into me. permiss me the pain of the limbo between us as my patience bleeds out like an oil spill.

my forebearance turns into absence as I fade into my grief. mourning what could’ve been under the guise of a smile and a dream of forlorn security.

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can’t remember where i got inspo for this, but main topic or prompt was being patient. i can’t yearn or long anymore. i’m going to lose it.

words from the graveyards caretaker, Kaine 𖹭